it was just another event

a typical ‘attending’ ‘not attending’ ‘maybe attending’

i see them all the time

i try not to be that guy that hits ‘maybe’ all the time

i try not to be the one that always says ‘no’

and there’s nothing worse than saying ‘attending’

with no intention of showing up

but then i caught a friend’s update

someone i usually expect snarkiness from

but that good kind of snarky

that ‘i know i’m a joke so i think i’ll tell one’

attitude…the kind i am drawn to

the kind i pay attention to

because lord knows i pay attention to myself

this wasn’t a typical one

the snarkiness was replaced

there was anger dripping

enough to turn the update into a gif

it was about this person

decapitated because he was gay

i thought he was a kid from the new blood

a cute little twink that got in the bars before he

was supposed to be in the bars

the kinds of kids i let into the urge

i was alarmed

whenever something happens to someone

because they are gay

i immediately take notice

i pounce on the news because

i may know that person

or i probably know someone

who knows that person

who knows i may have fucked him

who knows i may have had a drink with him

a smile, a seedy stare or a look of disgust with him

i may have never met him before

but he was gay

and that’s why he was crucified

and that’s enough for me to dive in

it is the one shade of my coloring

that i share with that person

whether plight or party

that person shares something with me

that only ‘ten’ percent of the universe

shares with me

therefore there aren’t a lot of us

so we should all know each other

we should all invite one another over

for thanksgiving

birthday parties

promotions and fundraisers

we should stick together

like the pages of a hand me down

porn mag

if stolen for the night

can be considered a hand me down

we should be brothers

we should be sisters

and when your brother or your sister


what do you do?

you mourn

you get angry

you get nervous

you get scared

you get up

and you pay your respects

you rip up the anger into tiny pieces

and you turn that smoky shrapnel

into a ticker tape parade

confetti of confusion

but you throw it

and you love it

and you make a promise

to watch each other’s back

a little tighter

a little more seriously

a lot more